It’s important to understand what to expect during your first therapy session.
You’ve made the decision to consult a therapist. Perhaps you’ve been thinking about it since months or maybe it just now made sense. In any case, there is likely a combination of hope and fear. What will they ask? Will they judge? So what do I say if I don’t know any of the words?
Let me give you an idea of what a first session is like and why it’s important.
The First Few Minutes – Setting the Tone
It is important to set a tone for the first few minutes.The first few minutes – Setting the Tone.
The impression you’ll get as you enter is the environment. A great therapy room is a quiet room with soft lighting, comfy chairs, perhaps a plant or two. This isn’t accidental. The room itself is conveying a message: “You are safe here.
You will be welcomed at the start with a friendly tone, some general pleasantries and will be told if you are comfortable or not. Not small talk – it is part of establishing trust. For some of us, we didn’t have a family that talked about our feelings, didn’t want to ask for assistance because it was perceived as weakness. It can be intimidating when you enter a therapy office. Then a warm welcome helps allay that.
Getting Started – The Life Story Question
What is your answer to the question “What was your life story?”
The first sessions are usually open-ended with a question like, “Tell me what brought you here” or “What made you come see a therapist now?
You don’t have to get an answer correct. There’s no need to have everything worked out! In fact, many people will say that they feel like “I don’t know where to begin” or “Things are heavy these days.” That’s enough.
The therapist will listen, listen and take notes. They’re not judging, they are understanding. They may ask probing questions gently to get the whole story:
- When has this begun?
- What is your average day at work like?
- Who do you have in your life for support?
- What have you done so far?
It is significant to gather this information. It gives the therapist insight into your symptoms, as well as your life context.
This is a common part of the therapy session process.
The Middle – Your History & Patterns
The Middle is a section on your history and patterns.
The discussion usually expands as the session goes on. The therapist may ask questions about:
- What you learned about your family from your ancestors (to understand the patterns you inherited, not to blame anybody, to be grateful to your ancestors for what you learn from them)
- Experiences that have affected you in the past and how they have influenced you.
- Coping mechanisms you are familiar with
- Your physical well-being, sleep, diet (Mental and physical health go together!)
- Any experience of therapy before.
This could be personal. That’s normal. Therapy is a very personal experience – you’re revealing stuff about yourself that you may not have shared with anybody else. If it’s too much information to share in the initial session, you can state it. It’s fine to say “not yet” when it comes to the conversation.
Setting Expectations – The Important Part
Creating expectations an essential component
At the end of the initial session, a competent therapist will say:
- How therapy works: Togetherness! You are not in a doctor-patient relationship with your partners, you don’t have to let your therapist “fix” you.
- Going forward: Sessions are usually 45-60 minutes in length per week (may be more or less depending on the client). It’s not a quick and easy solution – positive change typically happens over time.
- Confidentiality: What is said in the room will remain confidential (unless it is deemed to be a safety concern).
- Therapy style: Each therapist has their own approach to therapy. As one example, I employ RE-CBT (Rational Emotive Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) which concentrates on the impact of our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs on our experiences.
- Payment: How to pay for the cost, how to cancel, scheduling future sessions.
This helps make the first counseling session experience feel more predictable and safe.
Ending – How You’ll Feel
Current – How You’re Feeling
Many people don’t realize this, but you may feel tired after your initial session. You have been thinking and talking and processing – it’s work. That’s normal. Others feel relief, as if they have said things that they had been thinking about, but never out loud.
You may not feel ‘better’ right away. Therapy is not a solution for everything. However, you may be heard – just that could be enough.
What Makes a Good First Session?
Criteria for a good first session!
- They are listening to you and not judging you
- They explain how they work and don’t assume they know the way you want it to work
- They ask you if it is OK to go deeper into the issue and then prompt you to answer
- They are curious about your life, not just your symptoms and ask questions that lead you to the answers
- You have clarity about what will happen next, such as going deeper into the issue
This is an important part of quality mental health counseling.
A Few Things to Remember:
Here are a couple of things to keep in mind:
- The first session is no different: there is no right or wrong. There doesn’t need to be a clear picture.
- That’s fine if you do not feel a connection. Sometimes it is necessary to try a few therapists to find the one that is right for you.
- There is nothing wrong with you being here. You’re taking steps to take care of your health.
- We all feel nervous, excited, and maybe even skeptical at times – it is ok to feel any of these emotions.
Key Takeaway:
The first therapy session will be a session of exploring together. It’s a trial period, the therapist is getting to know you, you are getting to know the therapist. Don’t feel constrained to know everything. You’re showing up, you’re being honest and you’re making a step towards understanding yourself.
That takes courage.
If your heart and mind are heavy, it’s okay to ask for help; reach out to a professional psychotherapist in Mumbai who will listen.sights on therapy and self-understanding.
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